Relationship status: I just found a piece of chicken in my hair. I ate it. Then looked for more.
animals jokes
5,773 total · showing the first 120 · page 4 of 5
What does raccoon say to a lion king Raccoon say raccoon a matama ... Thank u my son
Why did I break up with my vegan girlfriend? She refused to swallow animal by-products.
Dolphin scientists say that dolphins are the smartest animal next to humans, but I think they're only saying that because they're dolphins.
i dropped a chicken mcnugget and I've been on the floor of mcdonalds sobbing the lyrics to how to save a life by the fray for 2 hours
Vending machines kill more people every year than sharks Obviously, how's a vending machine going to kill a shark?
why do feminists have two more brain cells than a cow? so when you play with their tits they don't shit on the floor.
Listen auto-correct, I've never tweeted about a duck. But I've tweeted the word fuck over 2648 times. Smart phone my ass.
What do you call an illegitimate female cow? Miss Steak
My friend got attacked by a bear recently It was really grizzly.
What do you call a cow with no hind legs? an utter drag
KFC came out with the Obama Bucket.. Its all left wings, and chicken shits.
That awkward moment when you die, and all you were trying to do was take a selfie with a lion on a jungle safari..
Sharks are more likely to go and attack men than women So if you are swimming with women. Just punch it in the nose Then throw her towards the shark
MOOF What goes moof? A cow with buck teeth.
Honey, were out of snake food. "What? For what snake?" Honey, I bought a snake
What do you call a cow with no legs? ....ground beef... tehe..
My urge to sing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" is just a whim away. A whim away, a whim away
Did you hear about the man who received a tip on a horse called Cigarette? He didn't have enough money tabaccer!
Why did the lion get lost? Because jungle is massive
Dear Apple: When I want to say "fuck" & "shit" I don't want to say "duck" & "shot". So duck the iPhone! Oh, shot!
Where do you shop for a pregnant cow? The Mooternity Section.
Want to hear a dirty joke? A white horse fell into mud. Want to hear a clean joke? Three men taking a shower together.
What do you call a cow with only legs on one side? Lean Beef.