environment jokes

one man six horses. a man was hospitalized with six plastic horses inside him. The doctor described his condition as stable.

Due to the impending snowstorm on the east coast The center for Global Warming research will be closed due to blizzard until further notice.

What's the difference between a round piece of plastic and a babies head? I don't use a round piece of plastic as a shift knob.

Baby showers are fun until someone has too much champagne and starts a plastic knife fight over a corner piece of cake. I need a ride home.

My girlfriend's plastic fork broke while she was eating earlier.... ....Just a tine-y bit. (i was so proud of myself but no one else laughed as much as I did )

What do you call a group of people in charge of renewable energy for a town? A solar panel.

When I was growing up plastic surgery was a bit of a taboo subject... These days if you mention Botox no one raises an eyebrow.

Trump's plan for global warming: nuclear winter.

I had to remove the battery from my carbon monoxide detector. The constant beeping was giving me a headache and making me feel sick.

Do you know how many planets are in the solar system? 7, after I destroy Uranus.

If you're not supposed to abuse cough syrup then why does it come with a little plastic shot glass?

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a newspaper bag? One is made of plastic and poses a suffocation hazard to small children. The other one contains newspapers.

Jesus' Greatest Miracles: 3) Turning water to wine 2) Raising Lazarus 1) Maintaining a milky-white complexion in a desert climate for 33 yrs

What replaces Steam, the gaming platform, in China? Pollution.

Chemistry Joke (Language) Daaaang girl, are you Fluorine, Uranium, Carbon, Potassium, Oxygen, Fluorine, and Fluorine? Cuz I want you to FUCK OFF

Starting a dating site for old farts like me calling it carbon dating.

Did you hear about the guy that was hospitalized with several plastic horses in his ass? His condition is stable

What do you call a lump of coal and a diamond hanging out together? Carbon Dating.

If plastic bags could be used as currency, my mom would be on a Forbes list.

"Welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous" "I see a lot of new faces in here this week and i just have to say I'm really disappointed"

I can't understand how Bruce Jenner wants to become a woman The plastic surgery has got be mildly painful, but the sucking out of half the brain has got be excruciating.

Welcome to the plastic surgery addicts association, Nice to see a lot of new faces here today.

Cashier: do you need bags? Me: do any of us NEED anything? Cashier: sir, I have a liberal arts degree too Me: plastic please

Chuck Norris drives a solar powered car at night.