*Running late *Light turns green but car in front wont go *About to honk when reads bumper sticker: honk if you love disco *Is late for work
observational jokes
202,469 total · showing the first 120 · page 3 of 5
I have a great knock-knock joke But someone else has to start. Go
One Girl, Two Cups would be a terrible name for a bra shop.
I'm thinking of visiting Saudi Arabia based on the upcoming week's forecast It's mostly Sunni
Organ Freeman http://i.imgur.com/plVQyUC.jpg
Why did the little girl in the flower dress fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.
What's the similarity between Bill Cosby and Santa have in common? They both come when you're asleep.
I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer I'm not sure what he laced them with, but I've tripping all day.
Here's hoping 2013 is the year in which I finally fix the bugs in my new time machine. -garyDelaney
I went to a weiner emporium today... I never sausage a sight!
The Brooklyn Nets
What must a policeman have before searching a rabbits' home? A search warren!
Why are there no knock-knock jokes about America? Because freedom rings. Happy 4th of July r/jokes!
What's Irish and stays out all year? Patty O'furniture.
What kind of dough do Hobbit bakers use? Frodough.
How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Zero, feminists can't change anything.
* feels winds of change * realizes it's just a hole in my shorts
The David Cameron diet: You'll never lose your pounds quicker.
My wife asked me to take her to the zoo the other day. I said "If you want people to see you they can come here and do it!"
My girlfriend refused to make a porno with me.. saying there are enough vine stars already
Next update: Twitter will tell you what the retweeter is feeling as they retweet your retweet. And what they had for breakfast.
What's the opposite of Christopher Reeve? Christopher Walken... I'll see myself out now..
You're so unfamiliar with the gym... You call it James
It's cute how the news wants me to stick around until 11 for the forecast. As if I didn't have 17 other ways to get that info in seconds.