Johnny was sitting in math class one day when his teacher called on him to answer a question. She asked, “If there were five birds sitting on a fence and you fired a gun at one of them, how many would be left?” “None,” Johnny replied, “because the others would all fly away”. “The answer is four,” said the teacher, “but I like your way of thinking”. “Now I have a question for you,” said Johnny. “Three women are sitting in an ice cream parlor. One is looking at her ice cream, one is biting hers, and the third is licking it. Which one is married?” “Well,” said the teacher nervously, “I guess the third one”. “It’s the one wearing the wedding ring,” Johnny replies, “but I like your way of thinking!”
teacher jokes
1,135 total · showing the first 120 · page 1 of 5
Timmy comes to school late. When the teacher asks why, he tells her, “I had to take a cow down from the barn and get her bred”. Then the teacher asks, “Couldn’t your father do it?” Timmy replies, “Sure, but not as good as the bull”.
A math teacher had a bird, and he trained it to talk. One day it escaped, and he yelled out the window, "Polly gone! Polly gone!"
My art teacher told me to draw a Tardis I think im going to fail since I just drew police box.
Math teacher joke Why do math teachers never get constipated? Because they always work problems out with a pencil.
Teacher: Where is your homework? Pupil: I was mugged on the way to school and the mugger took everything I had
Change sentence to tense? Teacher: Change this sentence into Future Tense, "I killed a person" . Student: The Future tense is "You will go to a jail"
What did Dracula say to the teacher? See you next period.
A student asks his maths teacher.. Student:Do you believe in god? Teacher:Well,I believe in higher powers.
Why did the students eat their homework? Because the teacher said that it was a piece of cake.
Teacher draws a penis on the blackboard. "Does any one know what that is?" "Yes," says Tommy. "My dad has two, a small one for weeing and a big one for cleaning the babysitters teeth."
Why did the blonde...... Why did the blonde fuck the mexican? Because the teacher told her to do an ese'!
Dog Teacher: did you finish your homework Dog Student: (still chewing) almost
Why was the algebra teacher arrested on drug charges? He was caught doing lines of math!
My physics teacher tells the most horrible jokes... Q: What does iron man eat in Burger King? A:iron rings! Q: What does iron man do in his spare time? A: Iron clothes...
Bathroom Boy: Can I go to the bathroom? Teacher: Only if you can say the alphabet Boy: OK abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz Teacher: Where's the p? Boy: "Half way down my leg.
My science teacher said he was going to show me his transistor. Imagine my surprise when a woman with a penis showed up.
Dirty Joke My teacher tells me there are 7 wonders of the world. I think there are only 2. *Vaginas and tits*
I once called my teacher mom I was home schooled
"Our teacher has a bad memory. For three days she asked us how much is two and two. We told her it was four. But she still doesn't know. Today she asked us again!"
Why did the teacher cross her eyes? Because she couldn't control her pupils.
It would make more sense to put a teacher in every gun shop.
When my teacher wanted to see an example of a ringed molecule... I got my arsole out.
Teacher: Why do you want to work in a bank Alan? Fred: 'Cuz there's money in it sir.