mothers day jokes

Happy Mother's Day To all the guys and sperm bank who helped you get your gifts and brunch today

What did you do for Mothers Day yesterday? Mothers Day is this upcoming Sunday.

Happy Mother's Day to moms around the world !!! advanced aprils fools day guys!!!

I can always count on the local cemetery for free Mother's Day flowers.

I posted "Happy Almost Mother's Day!" on this chick I grew up with's Facebook page, guess I was the only one who remembered her abortion.

If you haven't had a vagina around your neck... You haven't lived. Happy Mother's Day!

Mother's have mother's day and father's have father's day. What do male redditors have? -Palm sunday

Happy Mothers Day to all of the moms out there! Scared you didn't I?

A special joke for Mothers Day What's the difference between three dicks and a joke? Your mum cant take a joke.

Thanks for the free womb & board, Mom! Happy Mother's Day.

Don't give her a Fitbit for Mother's Day. I repeat, don't give her a Fitbit for Mother's Day.

In honor of Mother's day yesterday, did anyone here play jokes on their mom instead of give gifts?

if the waitress at this brunch doesn't give me the Mother's Day special then I shaved my legs and stole this baby for nothing

Dear necessity, happy mothers day! -Invention.

We're gonna break the Twitter on Mother's Day with Your Mom jokes, aren't we?

Moms have Mother's Day and dads have Father's Day. What do single guys have? Palm Sunday.

My mom's favorite part of Mother's Day is describing my birth in detail to an 18 year old waitress who is just there to get our drink order.

What did the little ghost give his mom for Mother's Day? A booquet of flowers.

What did Sigmund Freud do for mother's day? His mom.

So I was out shopping for a Mothers Day gift for tommorow I bet that scared the shit out of you

My daughter wrote, "I will see you every day of our lives," on my Mother's Day card, so I guess we've resorted to threats now.

Happy Mother's Day Reddit! What did you get your mom?

Poor Caitlyn Jenner. She missed Mothers Day & Fathers Day.

I can't wish my mom a Happy Mothers Day because she doesn't have Facebook. \_()_/